A Life Less Ordinary

Friends

By Irene    

So...how do you make friends once you're out of college and stuff? My co-workers are amazing, but they have their own lives already (ie married, much older, just settled). Relatively speaking, I do have a lot of friends in the bay area, but...after college it is pretty tough to keep in tough. Gone are the the days of randomly coming over to each other's apartments after class and sitting on a couch watching YouTube videos for hours. Or house parties...I really miss ridiculous house parties. So yea, I do miss my college bunch, and I haven't really said or thought that in a while. It's really time I buy my ticket and go to DC where I have two really good friends at the moment. I generally don't think about this sort of stuff and just sorta keep going along and then...boom I had this revelation on my way home (FYI at 9:30pm on a friday night because I was at work until then). I've signed up for several Meet Ups, which means I get a million emails every day from Meet up for a million things. But I don't have time at the moment to make significant commitment to going to one meet up group's events. So...where do I find a tight but diverse group of interesting people that I can hang out with and do various things - from crazy clubs, to mellow house chill-outs, dinner every once a while....where are all these really classy cool people I should be meeting living in a big city? Or....where is all my energy to organize really cool exciting things with people I already know? Maintaining relationships is really diffiucult, I mean, I can barely keep myself together (and barely is not too strong of a word here). 

Getting Back in Shape

by Helen

I did so well last year getting in shape for the wedding...and now I've set a new goal to climb Mt. Rainier which will hopefully get me back in shape that has been hard to maintain since the wedding. So I am going back to my morning work out routing - so far I worked out yesterday (day after my epic birthday celebration) and this morning.

Hopefully I can keep it up. 3 miles at the gym today felt good.

Prioritization

by Irene

I had my first real interview for a "real" job after college at the beginning of my last semester there. It was with a local city's transportation office developing their various transportation programs (car sharing, green fleet, educating building occupants about altnerative modes of transportation to the office).This was the interview I bought my first suit pants and professional shirt, as well as heels (the heels was much too high, can't believe I wore them to the interview). It's really true what they say: you definitely don't want your very first serious interview in life to be for your dream job....cause you're probably going to blow it. 

Which is precisely what I did. The interview was going as OK as it could've, until I was asked how I deal with prioritizing my time. If I recall correctly, this was due to the position reporting to two bosses and needing to push through numerous initiatives at once. I had no idea how to answer this question - I think I said something about...just figuring out a way to get it all done based on timelines...and gave an example of all the multi-tasking I was doing on campus. Cause, in college, that's what you did: you pulled all nighters, you crammed, you ran from point A to point B....and it was all perfectly normal. So I wasn't really understanding what they were asking me, and it's taken me a while to figure out since starting and working at my job for over a year now.

So, prioritization is not actually , as my boyfriend pointed out, the same as balancing things. And, in fact, it's the exact opposite: it's giving some things more weight than others, eliminating other things completely from your list of To Do's, and having to make decisions on what is truly worthwhile, what actually needs to be done now, and what can wait, and what you should just say "no" to. On this topic, my co-worker recently sent around a really interesting article, here it is.This is a skill that has been very hard for me to work on. I don't want to feel like I'm compromising on anything either in my professional life or in my personal life. But that approach is unsustainable: there actually are only 24 hours in a day, and I have to learn how to ensure that I absolutely 100% include the non-negotiable things into that time, no matter what else has to drop.

I wish I could go back in time and answer that question now. It think it'd something like this:

"In order to correctly prioritize projects and timelines, I'd need proper information about  expectations and deadlines of the initiatives, so that I could outline a plan of action which enables me to meet the targets within a workable timeframe. In the case of two bosses, it will be crucial that both know the full list of projects on my plate, when each projects' key milestones are, and crucial time periods where I should focus on one projects vs. one that might be able to wait."

Writing the above, I think at work that we should play a drinking game. Everytime someone says, "milestone" "outline" "target" "timeframe" "KPI" ...we take a shot.

 

 

 

 

 

An Experiment

by Helen

I have decided to take up snowboarding. I actually started trying this a couple of seasons ago, but this season I am really going for it.

I remember my first lesson that I took at Steven's in 2008. It was a beginner package (great deal by the way, $89 and you get a lift ticket, gear and a 2 hour lesson). The instructor was no older than 20 or 21 and clearly did not just smoke cigarettes in his free time. When he was trying to teach me to do something on that first day - I remember him telling me "you can't be this uptight when snowboarding, you just gotta relax and go with it." And then he walked up the hill with difficulty to meet me because I couldn't get up and he struggled with his smoke filled lungs to walk up hill.

Well needless to say, I am not the most relaxed person you've ever met. Going with the flow is something I can sort of do, but not when it involves doing something new that I'm not very good at and could result in broken bones. So the direction of relaxing seemed absurd to me.

Then I bought a pink and blue patterned jacked. Also something that I would really never embrace, but it gave off a good vibe and looked like something a snowboarder would wear.

So slowly but surely, snowboarding has become this thing for me - it is everything I am not. It is slightly dangerous, it attracts hipsters and it involves bright colors.

But I've finally linked my turns and I have bought my own equipment. As someone who always strives to improve at everything I do, I will also do that for awhile with snowboarding, but only until I can get down a black diamond in a comparable way to people who know how to board or ski. And then I will stop trying to improve. I will just go up to the mountains to be in the snow and enjoy people's company. I am not going to perfect snowboarding and learn how to jump or do tricks or stunts.

As a result, snowboarding is this activity in which I push my boundaries - I wear pink, I try to "loosen up" and I aim to just be good enough but not to excel and embrace that.

I am not sure if I will succeed, but I am going to do my very best.

Mt. Rainier Training

by Helen

I am a goal oriented person. Goals motivate me, inspire me, drive me and in general help me succeed.

So when I was in the first year of business school, a friend of mine threw out an idea of training for a half marathon and having never run longer than 2 miles, I said yes. So I did it.

Now another friend of mine suggested that as we all get to the age of 30, we should climb Mt. Rainier. And I said...sure, why not. Luckily for me, I did not actually check out much about the climb before I agreed and that's probably for the best. Adam agreed to join and so did another friend so there will be 4 of us who will train, hike and overcome this challenge together from Septemer 6-9, 2012. After we victoriously come down the mountain, we will retreat to the San Juans for a couple of days with an expensive bottle of champagne.

My goal is to use this blog as a training journal of sorts as we climb the most beautiful peaks in the Northwest in preparation for the big climb in September.

So off we go. 14,000 feet, 2 days of mountaineering school, 2 days of climbing, 1 short night in a hut and lots of equipment that we'll have to rent, buy and learn how to use.

Tidbits

By Helen

Today I had an all hands meeting at work. All-hands basically means your extended team meeting. I got to hear my manager’s manager basically wax philosophically about life and lead the group in a
discussion of how our work is going and what to expect in the next year.

I knew when he interviewed me that he was an inspiring person and today proved it more to me. He
is young, motivated, and a rising star. The way I really know that I respect this person is because I’m always worried that I don’t sound as great as I could in front of him and he wouldn’t take me seriously. Anyway, that was a digression.

I did hear some good nuggets that I thought I’d capture:

-Simplifying things is actually really hard. That seems so counter intuitive but I think so true. Though something seems obvious in retrospect, it’s actually harder to simply than it is to have a complicated process.

-Just because you did something one way last time, doesn’t mean it has to be done again next time.
It’s amazing how hard it is to convince people of that when you are trying to push for something new.

-Don’t suffer in silence. This actually came from my manager (who is also someone I admire). If you need something changed or fixed, find
the parts that you can control and fix them.

Anyway, it was great to get this perspective today.

Starting a New Job - Again

by Helen

I think I should document the beginning of my professional life after business school. It’s easy
to forget that I once upon a time was in the working world already and am now back to it after a two year break. Having said that, it is hard to remember the feeling of being lost and overwhelmed that comes with starting a new job. It is humbling and exciting and traumatizing all at the same time.

For context, I am working at a “small” software company in Redmond. The last company I worked for grew from 10 to 30 people while I was there and many of us weren’t sure if it would survive the cultural shift (it did). I don’t remember how long it took me to ramp up, but it definitely
wasn’t immediate and the game changed with every client and project. While there I always felt that my work was important: it was helping somebody get elected to do good things for his/her country, district, and people.

So here are the top 10 things that are interesting/weird about the place I work:

1. Every Monday is a new employee orientation. While the company is mature, on the day when
   I started, 124 other people started with me.
2. When you get an email from anyone you don’t know, the first thing you do is look them up in the org chart.
3. You think of revenues and costs in at least millions.
4. 15 minutes is the minimum amount of time you need to travel across campus to get to a meeting, it could take up to 40 minutes on the shuttle.
5. During the month of October, the company focuses on employee giving with lots of events that happen during that month to encourage participation. I ran the 5k…with 2000 other people who work for the same company.

Fresh Brew Coffee

I live across a building which has a tiny unpresumptuous coffee shop on the first floor. The shop is called "Fresh Brew Coffee" with a fading green awning that says: espresso sandwiches pastries. When the weather is nice, people sit outside.

The place is run by a Vietnamese man, his name is Jackie as he is quick to tell you. He will always try to sway you to get his Vietnamese sandwiches, though there are regular deli sandwiches and all-day breakfast options which I usually go with. A great deal of thought was put into the little amount of available space. There are just 6 small metal tables split between inside and outside. There are shelves with the current newspaper and books by the window you can read while you wait or eating. Today someone walked in asking how much a newspaper was - Jackie said he doesn't sell them, they are just for his customers to read.

The food comes quickly, always by a teenage-looking girl, with braces, tall and lanky. It seems Jackie knows the majority of people who come to the shop. He knows their order. We spoke briefly as well, asking me if I'm working today (no), where I live (right across the street), what my name is (Irene), whether I'm enjoying my 3-day Halloween weekend (yes, and you?). I heard him do the same spiel with numerous people as I sat at my little table pretending to read my book while actually people-watching inside the shop and passing by on the street.

This place is simple, tidy and dingy, inexpensive, efficient. Much like a lot of these incredibly local TenderNob coffee shops. But the real gem is Jackie, who makes you feel like you just walked into his home and now is sharing his food with you. Often you don't pay until after you're done eating. A black little lady came in asking for Jackie, when he saw her while he was somewhere in the depths of the kitchen he shouted a hellooo and came out to sit at her little table and chat about something or other. As I was leaving, he was again somewhere behind the counter, honestly he couldn't have seen me get up easily, and told me to have a good day. This is a man who knows his job and his community in and out. And it's this that makes his shop stand out.

 

 

Left brain right brain

By Irene

As part of a team building process, everyone on our team took one of those personality tests. There are a bunch out there, but we took one called HBDI. This particular method divides the brain into right and left brain and cerebral and limbic. As in typical psychology parlance, left brain is more analytical/logical/fact-based, and right brain is more artistic, symbolic, intuitive-based. Cerebral (front of brain) is more calculating and limbic (back of brain) is more feeling. At least, this is how we were talking about the brain during a facilited session to discuss our test results. I'm sure that there are plenty of studies that show that it is more complicated than that. Our session was facilitated by a well versed professional in the field, this woman with like 2 PhDs and oodles of experience facilitating these conversations at large companies. Interestingly, a lot of her experience is working with large tech companies (Dell, Motorola, etc.)

Anyway, so we all took these surveys before this facilitated session. And the day of the session we got a profile folder assigning basically which "quadrant" of the brain we fall into. More interesting than seeing the results of your own profile, we guessed the profile breakdown for each other. This basically allowed us to see how other people perceive us and how other people perceive others on the team, and also of course how someone sees themselves. This exercise was particularly helpful because it ended up meaning we gave each other feedback on better ways to work with each other.

For me in particular it was interesting because my work involves a lot of data collection and excel spreadsheet stuff, but I enjoy the bigger picture/planning/creative thinking/managing stuff as well. But I am not really given that type of work because I'm perceived as being very data-driven/oriented. Which I actually am - and I have a hard time seeing the bigger picture without getting a really solid understanding of the paper clips and minutia. But I think I was trying to highlight this other aspect of me as well, which was often being over looked. So it was interesting, because during this discussion people were like...Irene...you're really right brained, but you're doing all this left brain stuff....?!? And I was like well yea...but I infuse the data intensive work you give me with creativity, and a more human element. Which is true...I like doing trainings, and I end up always pushing for more interaction with our field folks and getting their input/feedback. 

Anyway, I hope I didn't overplay my right brained-ness, but that I get some other type work passed my way as a result of this.

While you were gone

by Irene

Dear Helen:

You have done such a fantastic job keeping us all posted on your travels! I’m so glad you guys recorded videos and posted them (as well as the pics)! I thought…now that you’re back, I should give a quick updated of everything that has happened since you left – though, truly, it has not been much at all!

Let’s see….one weekend Ivan and I rented a car and we went camping in Mendocino National Park. That was fun – we swam in a lake, we wore SHORTS because it was above 70 degrees, we drove for miles and miles on unpaved road in a rental car, we slept in the TENT that you and Adam got me for my birthday! Great tent, by the way – perfect size for two people. It was very nice to get out of the city.

Then, one night I hung out with a friend I made in Ireland when I was there last summer. She’s actually French, and she and her boyfriend were visiting California. We went to a bar and then we ate delicious pizza and I had a really good time! We spoke some random combination of French and English, mainly English.

As you know, of course, I also cut my hair off. Which reminds me…I really need to donate it. It’s somewhere in my closet in a bag. I quite like the change – and it IS a change. I’m now shopping for jewelry/accessories so I don’t look too much like a boy. I think you said this and so has everyone who has ever seen mom – that I look a lot like her. Anyway, the hairdresser did a great job. I was nervous at work before going to the salon, but once I was there she was so excited to do my hair and just didn’t have a doubt that I would love it.  People’s super positive reaction at work has been really nice too. Everyone was just wowed by it.

Most recently Leo and I hung out when he came up north to visit Shark, his brother, and me. As Leo had just turned 21, we could go to bars, which we did. It was really weird but also totally natural at the same time. He’s so much older than the kid I usually associate him – you know, with bangs covering his eyes and not coming down during the Christmas party (when I was in high school) because he was so intimidated by all the people there. Quite a different Leo now!

And, of course, throughout all of this two predominant things have been happening:

1. I’ve been playing a lot of tennis, mainly with Laura but sometimes with Ivan too.
2. Happy hours after work.
3. Brunch and coffee.

Oh, also, I have been using the le creuset you guys got me – have made Moroccan chicken twice now – and it’s delicious. My favorite part is the way the couscous comes out, because it calls for cinnamon, turmeric, and cumin and you add raisins which really puff out. Anyway, it’s delicious.